Prius Unitended Acceleration Case Solved!
One of the most boggling cases of unintended Toyota acceleration has been solved, experts close to the case were saying today. The problem it seems was in fact due to extreme ignorance of today's mechanical devices. The driver of the car, calling himself James Sikes who is pictured here, 
is in fact none other than Jonas Grumby, skipper of the S.S. Minnow, shipwrecked on a uncharted desert isle for the better part of the last four decades. 
This does in fact explain his inability to understand the relatively simple operation of a vehicle such as a Prius which has even fewer controls than a typical automibile. His lawyer, Thurston Howell III, 
has claimed that since the Prius is not equipped with a throttle such as the one that existed in the Minnow, which Capt. Grumby also wrecked, he can not be held liable for the incident.
In a rare twist, however, a team of scientists led by Professor Roy Hinkley, 
have analyzed the wear pattern on the brakes of the Prius and show that they are inconsistent with Capt. Grumby's story. No doubt there will be an inquest to determine the truth of this important matter, and maybe they'll clear up what happened with the Minnow as well.
John, www.not-a-lemming.com